What’s the deal?

The njoy Pure Wand was a wake-up call: You (it seemed to say) should be enjoying a quantity of quality sex. And that’s why I’m here: to review the sex toys/aids lurking under/in/around my bed. Before we get intimate, here’s a brief overview of me:

I’m a(n)…

…student. (And I’ll give you a hint: an AU version of my college is featured in the webcomic Questionable Content.)

…short person. Let’s not gild the lily, OK? I’m short. For recreational tindr’ing purposes, I might describe my body type as “kind of average, you know?” or maybe “athletic.”

…appreciator of podcasts. No notes of leather and wild berries, and absolutely no hipster snobbery, I swear. Just a quick plug for my A-team. Kakos IndustriesSwitched on PopWelcome to Night Vale, and Snap Judgement: you rock my socks.

…female- and able-bodied. I acknowledge my physiological good fortune: I have no mobility issues, my health (reproductive included) is excellent, and the plumbing’s intact and in working order. Unsexy, maybe, but I believe it’s important to recognize right off the bat that other users with other bodies may not share my experiences of the products that I review. I’ll try for well-rounded reviews; clue me in if I slip up.

…proponent of body positivity. Bodies can be hell, and I’m new to being into mine. The past year-or-so has been one of the happiest of my life, and part of the credit goes to a self-image about-face.

0a09f6601e5f7c4ba49600dff19271feAnatomy time!

Two eyes, a pair of feet, ears that wiggle…Oh? Not that kind of anatomy?

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My clit stays in its hood basically always (it’s a homebody), and I have somewhat pronounced labia minora…which I would NEVER describe using a photo of a flower or an oyster. Not my bag (not my bag for my vag, anyway). My clit appreciates vibrations and pressure, and on the diffuse-to-pinpoint stimulation spectrum, it leans toward the diffuse. I like firm G-spot and A-spot stimulation, but with one important caveat: arousal. Arousal has to happen first. My vagina’s dimensions are pretty standard: about 4″ long and able to accommodate toys with a ~1.5″ diameter without a warm-up. I’m a butt stuff newbie, and the results have been mixed so far.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………

Here’s the plan: I’m going to review my toys/accouterments in chronological order from least to most recent. Svakom’s Barbara is the first batter up. For a visual, check out the Svakom Barbara sold by Svakom through Amazon.

Art credit: Nimura Daisuke (upper), Dan-ah Kim (lower)

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